My name is Ruth and this is my blog. These pictures do not belong to me, unless stated otherwise.
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I get a lot of asks about how girls think they might be gay and how could they be sure… and tbh, it’s hard for me to answer this because there is no test that I can point them to where the result gives them a “Congratulations! You’re gay!” or “Sorry! Maybe next time!” message.
So how exactly do we determine gayness? :/
1. You do not have romantic feelings for the opposite sex. You could find them attractive, but for some reason, you just don’t like like them.
2. The thought of falling in love with, marrying, and being together forever with a girl seems like a fairy tale for you.
3. When you were born, rainbow blood spilled from your mother’s womb.
4. Sleeping with a guy is not really on your to-do list.
5. You exclusively like girls.
6. *Optional. You have flannels. Lots.
7. Your inner gay is telling you and nagging you that you are gay.
Honestly, idk =))) I started liking girls late. It was just one girl that changed me from boy-crazy to this. I suspect I’ve always been like this. I have memories of making out with my life-sized doll when I was a toddler. But I found out I prefer to be with girls late, I was in my teens. (Or is that early?) I just woke up one day and realized I was harboring romantic feelings for a certain girl for months and then that was it. Anw, don’t stress. Sooner or later, you’ll find out. ;)
You’re welcome :) I know how much harder we have it because of our culture. Asian, religious background, old-fashioned family —I swear, it’s enough to make anyone closeted for life. It’s hard, but it’s worth it :)
Thank you ❤ your message was very uplifting :) I’m happy that I get the kind of support and encouragement from you guys that is otherwise very difficult to find elsewhere..
There was a time that I thought I might be gay, too. That was like 10 years ago. Now I’m pretty sure I am. :)
The thing is, it was also hard for me to figure out what I was because I used to be boy-crazy and I’ve had massive crushes on boys. (Later on, I realized all my male crushes kind of looked feminine.) But then one girl changed all that and there was no turning back ever since.
For some people, they’ve always known they weren’t straight. My girlfriend had liked girls from a very young age. But for some… it happened later on in life.
I really don’t think you should stress yourself much about whether you’re gay or not. Someone told me that sexuality is fluid and your preference may or may not change over time. You don’t have to be confused. If you find someone attractive, then you find them attractive. Doesn’t matter if they’re guys or girls. Doesn’t mean you’d want to marry them already.
But when you fall in love with a girl, and then she becomes your standard for everything, and then you can’t bear the idea of a relationship with the opposite sex, then you’re probably gay. :)
I’m glad to hear that you have already recovered from your failed relationship. I know how painful it is to get cheated on, so I know that rising above it can be difficult, but, yeah, not impossible. So, go you! For surviving that crap.
And I get how important it is to come to terms with your faith and your sexuality, and there are a lot of us actually, who are Christians and have managed to reconcile who we are with our faith. You can meet some of them here. In Tumblr. Or in Wing Ma’am. =))
And who the heck tells you that you aren’t gay enough? Like, what, didn’t score high enough in that gay-o-meter? And why would people judge your gayness by how you look? I mean, what, do those idiots expects us all to sport a mullet or something? You’re beautiful the way you are, don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise. Some girls are more comfortable with short hair and dressing handsomely (my girlfriend used to, but now she’s growing her hair out and dressing less handsomely). But some are lipstick lesbians and are happy with makeup and cute dresses and shit. Just go with what you’re comfortable with. You should be happy with who you are and how you express it, and you should surround yourself with people who support that. We’re here for you. :) xoxoxox
You are absolutely correct. Sometimes, people fail to remember that a certain verse is used within a certain context. But they will use it anyway to propagate their own beliefs. So it is also important that you know the Bible so you can go, “It does not say that. It was written during the time of… and what was really happening was the dreadful event of… it wasn’t about two consenting adults of the same sex sharing genuine love.” and then they would say this and that verse holds true whatever the situation may be, it fits whatever context… tbh, bigots will always find an excuse to defend their bigotry. :/
Thank you :) My first plan was pretty much like yours… but with my uncle butting in and everything… y’see, our family is one of those close-knit clans where you always get together for Christmases and birthdays and stuff, so I guess what he wants is not just my parents accepting me, but the entire family supporting me. And while that sounds very nice, the idea of coming out scares the shit out of me. Haha!
But there’s another question… does she want you? While I’m all for seizing the day and getting what we want, we have to take into consideration the feelings of the people involved.
If they are incredibly in love, I suggest you do not resort to homewrecking. But if they’re not into each other so much already and are just waiting for something to break them up, maybe you can be her good friend and you can ask her out to movies or whatever.
When we love someone, of course most of us would like to have that person love us back. But we can’t exactly force them into loving us back. Sometimes affections are earned. Be her friend. Take her out. Make her laugh. Be nice to her. Give her presents. And maybe, just maybe, she’d take all the sweet gestures to heart and like you back as well.